That Fucking Sonofabitch

Dear Fuckface,

I am very much disappointed at you. Never had I been so shock in my entire life. Never had I heard from you any respect, and the respect I have for you are now gone.

In short, I hate you.

Hate is such a strong word, I know. But know that no words can express how much I abhor your very existence. I can even admit that I was a slave to passion for you, but now I am a slave to rage for you.

Still unclear for you? Well, let me explain. What you did was not nice. Actually, not nice is a very big understatement. You have neglected the fact that I am, with no doubt, have feelings akin to low mortals such as yourself. How can you, peasant, neglect such fact? Your feeble attempt to strike a joke was not even funny enough to wake the dogs. Your immature judgement (if you can call it such), and your utter lack of understanding means that you fail to understand humanity. I do wonder how.

It's a good time to tell you I'm happy to be here with you. Feels like hell. Actually, it is hell. I've got my own life full of hard work. I feel like a slave, or go pick yourself a hell-related cliche.

My personal favorite? Hope to see you there.

Now let's go back to why I am pissed at you. You see, your statement wasn't really that funny. I should tell you that you are very fortunate that I am not there, because I'll cut off your balls and feed it to you.

I'll write you, duckie, another post since you were such a big part of my life. Keyword being "were".

Have a good day. You'll need it soon.

-Your evil overlord

Daddy

Tonight, I received a text message from my mother saying that my father was rushed to the hospital. She said that a nerve in his head had popped.

I'm very sad right now. No, it's an understatement. I am not yet prepared to lose my dad. I've yet to make him see me walk on the pedestal when my graduation comes. I've yet to show him my family in the future. I've yet to show my kids their grandfather. I can't take it! I will not accept that event.

I will pray for his safety... and I don't know why. I must keep myself collected, but inside, I am sure that I am slowly feeling devastated. I feel very, very sad right now.

For my dad, I will try my best. I will pray for his safety, and I wish that you guys would help me cope up with this shocking revelation.

I... I can't type much. I.. I'm blacked out.

Private Grand Chaser!

I managed to make my private server online... haha. Now I'm just making adjustments since I just reformatted my computer. I'm downloading different clients and trying everything out.

Now, I'm going to enjoy my private server and no one can do anything about it!

A much awaited trial

Finally I’m able to set up Windows Live Writer… and right now this post is made via the said program. I’m not saying much today, since I have yet to set up my day… so, tata!

Take that, Fuckers!

Ha, I am this close to tap dancing. I mean, I don't even know how to tap dance. Anyway, I'm so fucking happy because I am now left with little to none to do... except for one that I can manage on my own anyway.

Anyway, there is little time for me to rest, but I'd say that I would want to cherish this moment to tell the world this:

"Take that, you fuckers! I'm almost done with everything I have to do, so I promise to immolate you fuckers later!"

Hah. What a beautiful world this is.

Developer in the Making?

I've been dwelling on my course for some time now, so I tried putting my skills into test. I tried making servers of some games. Sadly, I am still a bit low on experience, and so I am doing my best into making more game servers. Fortunately, I've done Ragnarok and made it work. Now I'm going to make "Grand Chase", "Maple Story", "O2Jam", and "Audition" to work. Hopefully in the near future, I would be able to make all of these working.

Beneath the Scorching Earth, Like a Vampire?

I daresay that it's very hot today. Not only do I feel the heat seeping through every pores, but I also feel my head spinning. Kind of like jack hammering cement.

I felt very sick while walking beneath the blazing sun... as if my skin is burning.

A darkened spot on my hand - it looks like it burnt. I laughed, despite the misfortune. So I'm ultra sensitive to temperature... isn't it normal? And they say heatstrokes aren't normal.

Dammit, I need ice.

Over the Exams

Finally I am free from the horror that is the exams. Seriously, I lacked the sleep last night to hopefully maintain my sanity and now I am going to rest my brain by shutting off unnecessary things. Hopefully fate would allow me to rest.

SR Referendum?

First and foremost the DEFEND the OSR alliance calls for the students to defend the OSR from admin intervention. The mere existence of a referendum in the new UP charter without the prior knowledge of the students, is already a manifestation of admin intervention in student affairs.

Given that the new UP charter is already a law, we, the students, are given no choice but to do something about it. In the new UP charter, the selection of a new student regent should undergo a process of referendum, before the admin recognize the new SR. If the referendum fails, we will lose our sole representation in the board of regents, plain and simple.

Those who do not see the logic behind it are either blind or pretending to be blind. Yes, whether the referendum fails or not, the Office of the Student Regent, itself, as a structure will continue to exist. Shahana Abdulwahid might still remain as the SR. She might still continue using the OSR, but that does not give us any assurance that the admin will continue to recognize Shahana as the representative of the students in the BOR. That does not give us the assurance that the BOR will continue to recognize the existence of an SR...that is only one of the many things that might happen when the referendum fails.

There are many things that could happen, and those things does not necessarily mean it's favorable to us students. And if we happen to not-act out our rights and defend what we should and previously had long before this whole catastrophe happened, we will fall down to their hands and be played like discarded chess pieces lying on the floor of defeat.

We cannot also discard the possibility of an SR-Malacanang appointee, if the referendum fails. Since the failure of the referendum will show of a lack of unity among the ranks of the students, the admin might feel the need to intervene and supposedly "help" us in our dilemma. now, we all know what a malacanang appointee would mean. But, that also might not happen given a section in the UP charter that says that the SR selection process is a sole student affair. But then again, given the long history of the struggles of the students in fighting for their rights, it would not be surprising that the admin will find a way of intervening in student affairs.

Would you trust a complete stranger, per se, in the middle of nowhere, to tell you where you'd find freedom? Where you'd find a cozy place to rest? If a high-school graduate is capable of becoming a barangay chairman, what more could a student be? Of course, given that he could manage his academics. But academics does not say anything about responsibility. It only says something about how well you understand what your teacher understands and says to you, not on how well-versed you are in the topic. If you are well-versed in the topic you'd still have no assurance that you'd get a good grade from your prof (as an experience with one professor that is unclear in his decisions).

Voting yes to the referendum is securing our student rights--the rights that students before us have fought hard with their lives. If we fail the referendum, the time, efforts, and lives spent by these students will be put to waste. failing the referendum is tantamount to willingly surrendering our rights.

I always thought adults are previously those children whose dreams were bright and peaceful, but looking at now it seems their own, selfish future's what they are playing, and are cutting of the future of this world. In my opinion, and I wish to extend this opinion to all so that they would share my own, to continue such act would mean that they are cutting off the supposedly upcoming future. Go on, and stop giving the children a chance to equip themselves, and later on when you are old and turning to dust will you regret that you have left nothing to save this world from what you have done.

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As a final note, if you are going to give me negative comments, keep them to yourselves. I don't need them. I respect your decisions, no matter how absurd your reasons may be, so I dearly hope you respect mine. Don't give me crap about how wrong am I in doing this, because frankly, I don't care. I've understood what it means to vote yes. I attended and understood enough to make a stand. I don't make a stand based from what my affiliations say (i.e., what my organization's stand is), I base them from my own understanding. After all, I have the freedom to do so.

Unhappy, starting now.

Earlier this morning I have felt a very serious wave of unlucky-ness that I had hopefully asked for my feeling to be wrong. Even though yesterday was supposed to be my birthday, it did not excused me for the colossal holocaust that was bound to happen to this day forward.
Needless to say that it did not make me any happier than I am, and that is saying a lot.
I do not know why, but I feel this strong intuition that there is someone out there, someone close, that is always at beck and call whenever there is a need to prove me wrong, even if it is fucking 100% right. Even if I'm supposed to not-give-a-damn or disprove their "trying to disprove me" theory, I just keep myself quiet and let them feel their false victory. I mean, you can't blame me if I can control my emotions. You cannot blame me if I'm so forgiving.
Wrong.
I'm very unforgiving, I'm very vengeful, I'm very sadistic, and as a sugar-coated cherry on the top of the ice cream, I'm downright evil. I'm just coating it with a silent face. Maybe you could say that I'm a wolf in sheep's clothing. Well, I don't care.
I don't know if I'm able to keep this facade any longer. If I'm not so considerate of others feelings I would've dealt with it the old way - removing them from the face of the earth without any emotions attached. I could still remember the day when I impaled a pen on my class mate's leg, and that was when I was six years old.
Hah, sweet memories.
From now on, I shall keep my emotions at bay. Why? Because I am sure that whatever my reactions about to and for people would instantly send them to thinking. As if I care.
Yeah, I do care. I cry everyday about it.
Pfft. As if. I haven't cried in two years.
Surely an egoistical, self-centered, know-it-all elitist-ish being would fathom what he/she thinks he/she could swallow, even if you end up eating other's portion, or choking out yourself.
A big sigh please? Thank you.